First Love

Yesterday, my daily lent study by Henri Nouwen ( I love this man) was on Love and Relationships. It talked about the “First Love” and the “Second Love”. First love is from God, who loved us and knew us before we were born. The second love is from everyone else.

At times we expect from the second love what only the first love can give.  As soon as we demand a first love, unconditional, total love from another human being, who is limited in their ability to give and receive, we will be disappointed and let down. Oh what a struggle it can be when we expect a first love from someone who could only give a second love. I’ve done it, I know many others that have set themselves up for disappointment also. Friends with other friends, husbands and wives left feeling empty when their partner can’t fill their empty places with first love. Children looking to parents who themselves are flawed and broken……we all fall short in search of first love when we look to each other. It’s in the understanding of these two loves that we can have lasting grace filled relationships with one another. It’s knowing God is God and we are not.

In accepting and grasping His great love for us, having the courage to find first love where first love is found, in God and in God only. It’s only then that we can let go of the demand we put on others to love us in this way. We can be filled up and stand secure in His great love and not be so needy of others.

1 John 4:19 says “We love because he first loved us.”

May you know first love so that the second love is is sweeter, deeper and easier to give and receive.