Still Wandering…..

Wandering and pondering still….

It is a funny thing, this “no man’s land” down time on the calendar. When we quiet our minds from the day to day hum that is usually present, we start to hear things that could not have been heard in the noise of the normal everyday.

I have had to wrestle with a break-up from a wonderful man who even though fun, caring and loving was not the right one. UGH. There was no wrong or right it was just not a long term fit. I will blog more about this when it is not so fresh and painful. But in the quiet of this week my thoughts go to…..Is there another? For me for Him? Did I do the right thing? Alone again.

I’ve been thinking of the things we need to leave behind in 2010 ….. unforgiveness, fear and anger. What good will it do to pack these negative emotions up and move them into the New Year with us. Can we let the past be the past….at last? Then watch and see how God can restore our lives and start fresh. For with the New Year comes HOPE for what could be….. if we were really free.

I think about the upcoming year and what it holds, sometimes excited, at times anxious about the how’s, when’s and what if’s…. But I always can look at the year I am leaving behind and see God’s hand on my life. He has sustained me, directed me (re-directed me a few times), comforted me, loved me and most of all never left me.

This week is a gift, a preparation, a time of quiet and reflection. It’s like the end of a school semester, looking at the “grades” from the year before and then knowing what we need to adjust and work at to do better in this classroom we call LIFE. It’s a time of grace and celebrating what was done well.

So, with thoughts swirling with anticipation,  I will stay settled and go gently with great faith, that has been built stronger with each passing year, into the New Year. Taking a deep breath as I dive into the depths of absolute trust in my loving God and his plan for me and mine in 2011.