Now that I have your ATTENTION!

Coming off Lent, which is really 46 days not 40 days and no I am not bitter, but if you call it the “40 days of Lent” I think it should be 40 days. I know the whole Sunday’s don’t count thing, but if you gave up lying would it be okay to lie on Sundays? Or what about what Jackson and Grace gave up, not fighting with each other, would it be okay to go at it on Sundays? No! When you give it up I believe you stay in the desert until you have done the work…..or should I say until God has done the work within you.

As I step into the “New Life” Easter represents it had me ponder what my giving up meant and what was my take away? What happened in the 46 days?

I gave up alcohol. Now I know that sounds like maybe I was a lush, but not really. Just having that glass of wine at the end of a hard day was nice for I am a true YaYa by definition,  just ask anyone who really knows me. But when anything is taken away you tend to crave it, covet it, miss it more than ever!  It becomes the forbidden and everyone around you is a temptress (you know who you are!). It is the apple upon the tree, and we all know how that story goes.

At first I thought “Oh no! This is going to be tough!” and it was. It is amazing how we look for things to fill us up, make us feel better, comfort us, distract us and bring relief in hard moments ( I started with Jellybeans and Easter candy), but through these 46 days I found myself searching God out, going to him more than normal to make things better…..easier. It is was in these times he said…..”Now that I have your attention Merrill, here are all these things you have pushed aside and didn’t want to deal with but we are going to now!” YIKES! “It’s you and me now let’s wrestle…..” and we did. Whether is was about being single and dating, issues with my family, or about who God wants me to be and where he is leading me….. it all came up. He made me take a hard look at my caring about what others thought, their opinions and ideas about my life and then God clarifying and showing me….”these are my thoughts and plans for you, everything else doesn’t matter. It’s between you and me. It always has been.”
He Spoke, He comforted and He directed my path again. And as in Ezekiel 11:19 God said…” I will give them an undivided heart and put a new spirit in them; I will remove from them a heart of stone and give them a heart of flesh. Then they will follow my degrees and be careful to keep my laws. They will be my people, and I will be their God.”

This YaYa did it, I stood and was sustained and rewarded in my “giving up” for the Lenten season. It’s great to know that even in the depths of the hot desert that God’s presence finds you and brings great relief, wisdom and direction. I am so thankful for His great faithfulness, humor and love for this girl.

Next year I am giving up Chips!